The Bay Festival was yesterday. I've spent the past few years spending the day of the Bay Festival with Caity, but since we're not great friends anymore, we didn't do the same thing. I spent most of the day with Caitlyn. I watched the parade with my parents and Sarah. It was really nice spending time with them. I hung out with Jordan a little bit, but not that much. She was with Dakota the whole time.
I kind of feel like I don't have friends anymore. No one really talks to me anymore. No one seems to be putting any effort in to the friendships we used to have. It's like the philosophy is if I don't put the effort in, then we wont talk or do anything. It's getting to be really frustrating. I thought that I had the best friends in the world and that we would stay friends for a very long time, but I guess I was wrong.
I was just downstairs having a bowl of ice cream, and I couldn't help but think about how different everything is now than just a few months ago: I basically have no friends, the only person I talk to feels like a stalker because he s to talk to me every waking moment, my family barely talks to me, and my dog hates me. People were always saying that things would change after graduation, like your friends, but I though that I had more time before things came to this.
I'm getting more scared everyday as college approaches. It's not just that I'm going to be alone, but what if people there don't like me either? When I tell the few people that actually talk to me that people don't like me, they seem surprised. I don't know if it is my attitude or something else, but it's a very real possibility that I wont be liked there either. It's obvious due to the lack of communication from my former friends that I wasn't as well liked as I thought. I just hope that things will be different.
Just saying.
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